I have been trying for days to put a blog together regarding FanExpo 2010 so now I am just going to buckle down and do it. No stopping. No excuses. No sleep until I finish it. I will start IMMEDIATELY (after I get a V-8 Fusion)
Ok.. sorry, I am a vegetarian who hates vegetables so my Fusion is important for a healthy mind and body. (It probably is made from pig droppings and baby spit, but as long as I THINK I am doing a good thing I'm fine with it)
WHAT A TRIP!!! What a statement ABOUT the trip because when you say something like “WHAT A TRIP!!!” you automatically think it's good when, in actuality, I have said nothing about the trip, it's contents or it's enjoyability. Kind of like if someone asks you how your day is going and you say unbelievable. Read on gentle reader as I explain the ups and downs (and then no more ups) of FanEcpo 2010...
I went with three goals in mind. To help promote the Comic Book Store Movie, to meet and greet with Amy Okuda and Felicia Day and to obtain an Aperture Science Weighted Companion Cube. Let's see how I did...
Friday
I got into Toronto later than I thought I would on Friday with a van full of nerds. Yes, it was our time for Revenge on the city of Toronto. Revenge of the Outcasts or.. The Nerds Strike Back. I dunno.. there must be a reference in there somewhere. We checked into our hotel just a block from the Convention Centre and split up. I decided to forsake the Con on day one, opting instead to head into the Downtown Toronto Nightlife. I love wandering the streets of Toronto at night. The shops are open late, there are always bands and buskers and a man selling “Black History Month Literature” in August. (Yes... I bought it)
I tried Sushi for the first time and I have no idea what it was I had, but I was assured I was served vegetarian sushi. Avocado something was kinda gross, but I loved the egg something and yam something, and the big thing with the seaweed. You know the things I mean. Afterwards I met up with my friends from the “Comic Book Store Series” at a place called Gabby's and we had some drinks. They had food for dinner, I had delicious Rickard's Dark for dinner.
For anyone who read of my feud with Chris, I must admit I am embarrassed. We buried the hatchet after I found out we had taken a seven hour car ride and spent an entire day together. I don't recall it, but I must have made a humorous impression because he was joking around. Oops. Sorry Chris.
We laughed and played until 1:30 and headed to our hotels. I wasn't tired so I slept in the bathroom playing on my BlackBerry until someone kicked me out to dispose of their dinner. I was happy for the warning.
Saturday
For some reason when I woke up I had a bad headache, so I ventured to the lobby and purchased 10 advil for 10 dollars... which seemed at the time like the deal of the century. We enjoyed our breakfast and headed to FanExpo for what was SURE to be an amazing day.
Upon arrival I saw a line that stretched from almost the CN Tower, down to front street, down the road and entire length of the convention centre and around another corner down to under an overpass. “Heh.. suckers” I thought to myself smugly “That's why you pre-purchase your tickets.” Then a very rude FanExpo volunteer cursed directions to the back of the line for me. Excellent. Not even in yet and already pwned. About 2 hours later we arrived inside, where my friend Joe was already looking around. How did he get in ahead of me? He DIDN'T pre-purchase tickets, and that line was much much shorter.
I made it inside JUST in time to see the big Tron preview. 7 minutes of 3-D footage and an interview with Bruce Boxleitner. Great show and the movie looks amazing. Disney has a lot riding on this puppy, and they will wrestle some bucks outta me, no problem. Great show and only waited 30 minutes to get in.
Speaking of waiting, there was a lot of that once I left to head upstairs to the main floor. The escalator was not allowing people up because FanExpo oversold thickets. Thousand of nerds were yelling and throwing things demanding to be admitted to the upper deck. I waited 40 minutes in a crushing angry crowd on the verge of turning violent. I have to admit after 30 minutes, I started to understand why mobs go nuts. Finally, they slowly let people up to the main floor but in the time I was there, I heard horror stories. A man went outside to get his family some hotdogs (The food lines were upwards of 2 hours) and when he tried to get back in, he was told there was no re-admittance. There were people from all over, including a family from Vancouver who had VIP tickets and were told they would not be allowed in the building, and when they asked for a refund they were told “All sales final”. I could go on and on with similar stories, but I'm sure you know the deal... Onward and upward (up the escalator that is).
When I got to the top floor, my shoulder to shoulder problem was not eased. I felt like a blood cell flowing through arteries (and based on the size of a lot of the nerds, those arteries were an order of chili fries away from defibrillator). I had no control over where I went. I literally had to go with the flow. I checked the “Comic Book Store The Series” booth and they didn't want me (story of my life) so I tried to get over to the Felicia Day/ Amy Okuda booth. I couldn't see anything for sale anywhere, because of the mass of people so I just set my eyes on my goal. When I got there, I was told, Amy and Felicia had gone downstairs for a photo op. Frack Off...
If you are wondering why thats bad it's because I would never get to come back up to the top floor again. I stumbled around a bit, went outside for a hotdog and left the expo very upset.
That night I went to Industry Night with Trent and we had a free meal which was interrupted by a group of 8 Fan Expo volunteers all very proud and sharing stories of their rudeness to the people there. One guy joined them, threw my bags on the ground (Thanks for the bent poster) and proceeded to yell at everyone he knew that happened to cross behind my ear. Thanks “Chubby Load” (his nickname Trent and I gave him), I appreciate the hearing loss, and the pasta barrage my ear suffered.
I was invited to watch the Season Two of our DVD but the people I was sharing a room with didn't want to. They wanted to go out for a night on the town.. which turned into a night of gossiping in the room. I paid little attention as I played Portal to completion.. and went to sleep.
Sunday
As you can see, very few of my objectives have been reached. Which is to say none of them. Today would be different, I vowed... but God had a few more fingers for my bottom.
After waiting for 8 elevators to go down for breakfast (everyone was packed full) we took the stairs.. which lead to a dead end on the ground floor. I could feel the imaginary flames licking my back as I envisioned how this would have played out of the building were on fire. I climbed the stairs to the second floor and went down another flight which lead to a door with a huge red sign that read “EMERGENCY EXIT ONLY – ALARM WILL SOUND”. I then climbed the stairs again quietly complaining that there was no way to the lobby and we were now “owned by the hotel” but a nice man told me to go through the red signed doors, stating “There isn't really an alarm hooked up”. I chuckled again at the thought of an emergency with no alarm going off.
Breakfast was a nightmare but it fuelled the tank for my last chance to achieve my objectives. Do you remember them? 1/ Amy & Felicia, 2/ Help with DVD, 3/ Companion Cube.
I must say Sunday started out much lighter on the crowd side. I made a path for Felicia and Amy and HERE is my favourite part of the story. I went up and selected a picture to have signed and paid my money. Felicia said “Hey whats up?” to which my reply came “Nothin' just checkin out a convention.” Felicia looked around and said “Yeah, me too” she took the picture I selected and asked if I wanted Amy to sign it too and I replied that of course I did. She asked my name and I said “Shane”
“Jane?”
“No Shane”
“Jane?”
“No S-H-A-N-E”
“Oh! I wondered because you don't look like a Jane”
“Well Tom Jane was supposed to be here,” I pointed out, “but I don't think I can live up to his reputation.”
I got a smile but I don't think either of them got the joke. Tom Jane stars in the show “Hung” and you can guess what his main attribute is. I thought it was clever but, who knows.
I'd like to note that Amy looked like she felt very out of place, and I want to defend her with this example. Have you ever been with a pal and you happen upon a group of his/her friends? They get to talking and you don't really know how much you should be involved. Well take that and add that Amy was sitting under a big sign that said “Felicia Day” and beside one that said “Felicia Day Autograph $25 / Amy Okuda Autograph $10.” Even I felt uncomfortable.
I had my picture snapped, thanked them and was on my way.
I looked around at the booths, thought the place was really starting to fill up. I didnt find a companion cube and my help was never requested at the booth. As I continued to wander I saw a tweet that Felicia was leaving so I made my way back to celebrity row. I saw Shatner and Adam We (West). I was going to get Adams picture but it was $60. A little more than I want to pay for a novelty. I saw Amy sitting under the huge Felicia sign and there was no line... so I went back.
“Hi it's me again, sorry to bother you. I really just wanted a picture of you but I didn't want to be rude earlier.” With that, I coaxed a HUGE smile out of Amy and she asked me which one I wanted. I selected a Guild picture of her and she asked if I wanted it signed, I said of course and she asked my name.
“It's Shane”
“Jane?”
“Sha.. didn't we just do this?”
“OH YEAH! SHANE!” she giggled and began filling out the inscription. I continued talking.
“Yeah I was excited to see you were here. You celebritweeted me” (Yes I know I just invented a word)
“I did?”
“Yeah, you announced you were coming and asked who would be there and I made a dorky reply 'I AM I AM.. err.. I mean .. I may pop in whatevs' and you tweeted back to me 'wee'”
“Oh yeah, I remember”
“Since then I've explained to my friends that clearly you and I are in a serious and committed relationship”
“Well we're already married right?”
I looked at Trent who was holding the camera. “See! I TOLD you”
We laughed, she came in close for a picture, I thanked her and continued on my way, hoping that some of that wasn't acting, and that maybe I made her feel good about herself. To be honest, she IS my favourite on the Guild and I would have GLADY paid the same for her autograph that I did for Felicia's. She deserved better billing than she received.
After that I had a little street (veggie)meat, found the car and headed home.
Fan Expo was horribly run. They sent an apology letter out that I don’t feel covers it. It's posted below. Also I am posting some pictures. I'm sorry for the length of the blog, but I don't have editing time. I have to be up in 4 hours.
Be well friends!
A small part of the angry mob
Me and a Black Cat
@RyatOnline and the Pure Pwnage guy
Shane Roberts, Amy Okuda, Felicia Day
Great Link Costume
Im on the Chubby Grid!
Steam Punkers
For My Disney Pals
Me and the wife :-P
